Rebecca Black at Reading Festival and other leaks.

In a week where there is military action in Libya and continued unrest in the Middle East, other big news has just broken. The Leeds and Reading Festival lineup has been leaked and a possible surprise act could be joining it.

There are highly unsubstantiated rumours from a number of unreliable sources today who are claiming Reading and Leeds Festival are jumping on the Rebecca Black bandwagon. They say that Rebecca, 13, who has been an internet 'sensation' with dreadful song 'Friday' is due to headline Friday night at the annual festival in Reading. We have also been informed that fellow headliners, My Chemical Romance, are considering a duet with the California based schoolgirl, but this is yet to be confirmed. It is thought that due to many artists including George Michael, Barry Manilow and Chesney Hawkes, turning down the festival, organisers had been forced to search further afield for a popular act. Although not officially announced yet, and not featured in the leaked line-up due to rumoured ongoing contract negotiations, it is yet to be seen whether or not Rebecca Black would be a hit in the UK on the festival scene...only time will tell.

Confirmed artists in the leaked lineup for the Reading and Leeds festival include other headliners, The Strokes and Muse. Personally I can't decide whether I'd rather listen to the depressing ramblings of Muse or go on holiday to Libya, dressed from head to toe in Ginger Spice's Union Jack dress, screaming "Gadaffi is a bellend" from the rooftops of his palace. This is the extent of my hatred for Muse!

Other artists to play the festivals include Beady Eye (half of Oasis), Pulp, Elbow, 30 Seconds to Mars and Interpol. For the full leaked lineup, see the picture below!

By Jon Shed with 2 comments

Comic Relief

Before I start this blog, I promise I will not show any pictures of starving kids to try to guilt trip anyone into giving money for Comic Relief. Firstly, this is a humorous blog (i hope) and so this would be largely inappropriate and secondly the idea of this blog is not to beg you for money, but to have a look at some of the ways people are raising money this year.

This year, Comic Relief will take place on Friday 18th March (unfortunately, due to this scheduling, pop sensation Rebecca Black will be unable to make an appearance with her 'popular' debut song as she is rumoured to be out partying that night). 26 years since it's creation, Comic Relief has raised over £650million, helping charities in over 75 countries worldwide and making a massive difference every day of the year, which it is to be massively commended for. I don't normally give money to Comic Relief as I prefer to donate to my local charities and other charities that mean a lot to me, however this year, if I get to watch the whole of the Comic Relief show and don't have to see Lenny Henry attempting to be funny, then I may make an exception.

This year, Radio One presenters Chris Moyles and Comedy Dave are attempting to do a radio show for at least 37 hours. Some people may view this as radio hell and would rather listen to Jedward argue with each other about who sounds more like Louis Walsh or who's quiff looks more like a Baboon's arse, but personally I quite enjoy Chris Moyles's show so will no doubt be tuning in.

Other fundraisers have included a celebrity walk across the desert, a tightrope walk by Helen Skelton between the chimneys of Battersea Power Station and of course many smaller local fundraisers which will raise the majority of the money for the charity. Let me know what you have done in the comments!

The biggest talking point this year though is arguably #twitrelief. It has received much criticism and there have been many angry tweets from people commenting about the 'egotistical celebs' taking part. The idea of the scheme is that people can bid on ebay (here) for one of the celebs involved to follow them on twitter, as well as receiving a vareity of other prizes. I personally think it should've been called #twitterprostitution! I agree with the criticism to an extent, but if I was in their position, I would do exactly the same; they are using their status to raise money and at the end of the day I can't criticise that!! So far Lily Allen's tweet is worth the most at £3000 (here), whereas poor old Mary Byrne is worth only £78.32 (here), which is £3.68 less than Frank Skinner's oven gloves (here) and £126.68 less than Stephen Fry's frying pan (here).

If you disagree with the premise of #twitrelief, there is always the option to bid on #plebtwitrelief, an idea by @dawniepants and brought to my attention by @peacockpete whereby "us plebs offer something up as well as the celebs". He is currently offering a custom piece of art showing YOU in space and with 3 days left it is currently at £26 - view it here!

There are also many more items for sale for #plebtwitrelief (also called #twebrelief), on @dawniepants blog which can be found here http://inanityandthegirl.blogspot.com/.

Either way, give money if you want to and enjoy the Comic Relief show on Friday night (or go out clubbing and get absolutely Charlie Sheened!!)

By Jon Shed with 5 comments

2012, Professor Brian Cox and Talentless Musicians

With the recent influx of natural disasters around the globe, many people are questioning if this is the beginning of the end of the world.  Is there any point in me writing this blog when the odds of anyone but myself reading it are slimmer than one of Naomi Campbell's legs.

For those who have not heard, the Earth is due to end on the 21st December 2012, but it's not all bad news, think of all the money you can save on Christmas Presents. With the world ending 4 days before an old fat paedophile, dressed in a fluffy red outfit Lady Gaga wouldn't be seen dead in, climbs down your chimney, it's the perfect opportunity to save the money you would've spent on presents and spunk it all on a first class trip to Amsterdam and a classy prostitute! Of course, how legitimate is the prediction that the world will end? Well what I have heard is that the Mayan's, an ancient Colombian civilization of expert Astronomers, wrote a series of predictions and prophecies about the future according to their knowledge of planets and the night sky. The Mayans never actually predicted the end of the world in 2012, it is the end of their so called 'Long Count Calender' which lasted 5,126 years. People are reading into this that because the calender is ending, the world will end. My calender has ended on 31st December every year of my life but I'm still here and fully expect to still be here on 22nd December 2012 and if we are not then at least no one will be here to say "I told you so". The deciding factor in all this for me is that I have not yet heard Sir Patrick Moore mention the fact that we will all die in 2012 and he is not only an expert astronomer, but he also has a monocle, which makes him twice as intelligent as the Mayans!

Talking of intelligent people, Professor Brian Cox, the only scientist any women have ever found attractive, is back on our TV screens tonight (in the UK) with his new series The Wonders of the Universe! With more brain cells than the entire cast of The Only Way Is Essex put together, he effortlessly explains why everything we see exists with an enthusiasm not seen since Eddie the Eagle ski jumped to stardom at the 1988 Olympic Games. As a guest on Something For The Weekend this morning he explained that the recent Earthquakes and Tsunamis are not the beginning of the end of our planet, but a sign that the Earth is very much alive and purely an unfortunate side effect we have to live with in exchange for it being a habitable environment. So as my thoughts are with all the people recently affected by these natural tragedies, I am at least comforted by the fact that this planet will remain for many years yet.


From the talented, to the untalented. I was today made aware of one of the worst songs to grace my ears since Justin Bieber's 'Never say Never', which incidentally says the word 'never' 22 times, the lying bellend! Here is the aforementioned song by Rebecca Black and named Friday. It is a song with more auto tune evident than Black Eyed Peas and with its lyrics seemingly taken straight from a preschool lesson on the days of the week. If this song makes it into the charts, I will perhaps rethink whether I believe this world should end soon or not!

By Jon Shed with 7 comments